Arrasian Foolishness: April Fools Ideas

I've had a good April Fools day. Lot's of funny pranks and hoaxes played on the people I love. I'm insanely good at this holliday, so I thought I'd impart some of my wisdom on you, loyal readers, as another April 1st fades into memory.

(Do we actually have any loyal readers? Or do Kevin, Eric, Dan and I just check this blog 50 times a day, accounting for the thousands of hits we've apparently had. Like, 2 people have posted comments, and no one signs our guestbook. Maybe all our readers lack keyboards.)

GOOD APRIL FOOLS JOKES

• While your friend is sleeping, sneak into their room and glue all their stuff, furniture and everything, to the ceiling, and flip all their posters upside down. Then when they wake up, they'll think THEY are the ones on the ceiling and they'll be afraid to get out of bed, so they'll miss work and get fired. APRIL FOOLS!
• Cut your friend's car breaks so they get into an accident on the way to work and have to go to the hospital. Again, they'll miss work and get fired. APRIL FOOLS!
• Put lots of Ex-Lax in their breakfast. Then steal all the toilets in their house and barricade them indoors. They'll be too smelly to go back to work for a week. Surely, their boss will fire them. APRIL FOOLS!
• Shoot your friend in the knee cap. APRIL FOOLS!
• Memo to self: when Fyall goes to sleep tonight, go into his room, scream "APRIL FOOLS!" and pee on him!

(Correction: please ignore the "Memo to self" part. Also, please substitute "your friend" for "Fyall" and "tonight" for "April Fool's Eve.")

• The DeShaun Williams special: sleep with the girlfriend of your teammate - and the star - on your basketball team. APRIL FOOLS!
• Eat a grape from the produce section of Wegman's without paying for it. APRIL FOOLS!
• Get your friend fired from his job. APRIL FOOLS!
• And my personal favorite...shoot your friend in the knee cap so he gets fired from his job! APRIL FOOLS!

Ah, good stuff! We all need a good chuckle now and then. That's why I love April Fools day!